Aug. 27, 2025
That Doesn’t Define me!
Season 5
Prodigal Children
Abuse & Addiction Recovery
Faith During Trials
Healing & Deliverance
How To Deal With Others As A Christian
Marriage & Family & Divorce
Chronic Illness And Health
Time Management
Ministry
Trauma shapes us, but it doesn't have to define us. In this raw and transformative conversation, Denise G. Lee bravely shares her journey from unimaginable childhood sexual abuse to developing a sex addiction and ultimately finding freedom through authentic faith and recovery.
DENISE G. LEE'S WEBSITE: https://deniseglee.com/
ARE YOU A MAN STRUGGLING WITH THIS ADDICTION? Listen to LOGAN HUFFORD share his story from season three.
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00:00 - Denise's Story of Childhood Trauma
05:08 - Confronting Sexual Addiction and Church Hypocrisy
10:17 - Recovery Journey and Finding True Faith
17:31 - From Addiction to Healing Entrepreneur
23:00 - Authenticity and Grace in Faith Communities
28:37 - Extending Compassion Instead of Judgment
WEBVTT
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Friends, this episode is a powerhouse.
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I cannot emphasize how much I love Denise G Lee.
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She is a sweet woman, so funny, so funny.
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We are cackling in this episode.
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She has such a heart for God.
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She has been set free from a very toxic addiction that was brought on because of childhood events.
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This episode is going to encourage you, empower you.
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Hopefully, if God forbid, you are going through the same addiction.
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It will give you another avenue of help and hope.
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But this is also going to be tough to hear some of the things she's going to say that she went through and that she did through this addiction.
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So this is not something you're going to want to have your little kids around to hear.
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It's mainly it's in the beginning, but definitely I would find a different place to listen or watch this, just at least for the beginning part.
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But it's not, for the faint of heart is definitely difficult to hear.
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So there's that caveat.
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But without further ado, we are going to get into her awesome episode so that you can be blessed by her content.
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Before the episode starts, make sure you follow the show so you never miss another episode.
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I am very excited to talk to you so you never miss another episode.
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I am very excited to talk to you.
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I read your bio on Podmatch and it really encouraged me, because I have also had an addiction that I have overcome, and it looks like you have found success afterwards.
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Unfortunately, that's not always the case for people who have had addictions.
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Either they have come out of it and they just haven't been able to get back on their feet yet, but it seems like you have, and I'm pretty sure God had something to do with that.
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So why don't we start with your testimony and then you can share about your addiction and how you came out of it?
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Thank, you, anna, so much for having me and just really a pleasure to be here, and I know that every conversation you've had with guests and even just solo, it's just been through a heart of God and so well good.
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Thank you so much for your work.
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So when I think about what you said earlier about success, right, and my addiction, I don't really think it's a success.
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I think it's God's blessing for today.
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I don't think that recovery is something that well.
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I'm done with this, like I've moved on.
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I'm like I'm riding a unicorn and I'm on the happy land of destiny.
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I don't think that's what it is and I don't want anyone who's listening to this or watching this thinking that, well, denise is going to share my five tips to success as a Christian woman, and that's not really what this conversation's about.
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You know, I grew up in a situation that primed me for multiple addictions.
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I was raised in an environment where I had a neglectful father figure or father and a mother mother figure that repeatedly raped me from like birth until like 12th.
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Like sexually, like penetrated me with objects and stuff, and I'm not going to get into the graphics of it because that's beside the point.
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But it didn't stop until I was taken away to child Protective Services and I gave them my own bedroom.
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How old were you when that happened?
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11.
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When you were set free from them, it was 11?
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.
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I was reintroduced, unfortunately, but that abuse stopped when I was 11.
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Wow, okay.
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I didn't mean to catch you off, I just wanted to know.
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No, no worries, I didn't have my own bedroom when I was 11.
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Wow, okay, I didn't mean to catch you off, I just wanted to know.
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No, no worries, I didn't have my own bedroom until I was 11 years old.
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I shared the same bed with my mother, and so when you're observing and you're watching sexually graphic things and that's normalized it was a setup for me to be also normalized.
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When I saw hardcore porn scattered around the home, it was a setup for me, equating uh being touched inappropriately by uh, wouldn't say teachers, but people who are supposed to be in leadership positions.
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That was normalized.
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And so it was a gradual thing to just have a full-blown sex addiction.
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And I didn't think it was at the time, and it wasn't until I was 27, 28, when I actually started actually getting recovery and starting that healing journey.
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So you can imagine having perverse sexual relationships with same sex, opposite sex, any type of sex whatever.
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That was normalized.
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And I was going to church, which is weird, which.
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I'm laughing.
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No, I get it because I had a 17-year pornography addiction and I was still going to church and I was judging the people in the videos and strippers and everything and thinking like I'm better.
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But I'm sitting here looking at this so, yeah, I, I totally get the chuckle of what was I thinking.
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Yeah, I get it.
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Yeah, and it was.
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I would, I remember.
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I would just like read through the Bible and and there was a Paul's humble.
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You know, homosexuals and all these people like, yeah, god's gonna get them, god's gonna yeah, you see but yes, yes, our, our planks were super in our eyes and yet we were like, no, we got you with your specs.
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Yeah, I, just how you get it.
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I don't understand where we thought we were going with that, but yeah, I completely.
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I relate in so many ways to that.
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Addiction does a lot of wild things, and my eyes are about to well up with tears because, in my mind- Let it flow if you need to.
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It's honest Christian conversations, yeah.
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Because I think for a lot of us who we go to work or we're parents and we're like we're having all these roles, and then he was found out that over like 15 years of his being that music leader capacity, he was having propositions with young men and what made it twisted about it was that his wife was a life coach for women, talking about empowering themselves and showing up for themselves.
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And you're having literally like you're housing a sexual predator in your house.
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And the reason why I'm mentioning is that there was no way, if you're in, because sexual addictions are progressive there is no way you could not have seen there was some deviancy and the whole community around them was kind of aiding and abetting because clearly he was creating good music Until enough people were saying this is problematic.
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Yeah, and I'm mentioning this because I, for me, it was becoming problematic until I, like they were trying to kick me out my last job.
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I was, I didn't have any friends, I had, uh, people who were literally throwing my life, former lovers.
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It was a cumulative effect where I had to stop and I pray that that music leader that I mentioned I'm mentioning means, because that's beside the point gets the healing that he needs and for a lot of us who have gone through that, it usually has to get worse before it gets better.
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Yeah, I agree, my situation got really bad before I finally realized I needed help.
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So it wasn't until, for me, my recovery journey.
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I wish I could say that, even though I always said I was a Christian, I didn't have a relationship with God.
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In fact, I had a very angry relationship with God and it wasn't until I got kicked out from a therapist that I was seeing at the time and forced to go to a 12-step recovery program called Sexaholics Anonymous it's a spinoff of Alcoholics Anonymous and in that program they said you need to rely on the God of your understanding.
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And I know it wasn't Allah, it wasn't Shiva, it wasn't all this other stuff, and I didn't want to go like get some spiritual rocks or whatever.
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I knew it was Jehovah Jireh, but I didn't know who he was, Despite the fact that I was raised in Episcopal church, then later went to Roman Catholic church.
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I didn't know God.
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I had a Bible that was on the knife stand.
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It was more of less like decor.
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I just dusted it off every once in a while.
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Yeah, yeah, wow.
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Your story is resonating with mine.
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I didn't come back to Christ until I was 30.
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It accepted him into my heart when I was 12, but I never really felt saved until I was 30 years old, and that's when I really felt that I knew I was a child of God and I still had my addiction to get over.
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At that point too, I mean, I think maybe a few years into coming back to Christ is when he helped me get over my addiction.
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For a lot of us who are struggling with addictions.
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I'm speaking my I shouldn't say for a lot of us.
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I don't want to generalize because I don't know everybody's story, but I know for me, the biggest God that was interfering with me was God with, with, with god, the real god, the lord god.
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Almighty jehovah, rosh agra.
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They're like different iterations, but that god was defroning the parental figures in my life and they created this environment that my god is, myself and my pleasure and comfort that's definitely a toxic god.
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that's how.
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That's how we make terrible choices, that's how we stay in our sin, because we think we're most important.
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We forget that what we do affects others and how others see us, and I'm very glad that I was able to get out of my addiction, because my head is so much clearer, my heart is so much clearer, and I imagine you feel exactly the same way.
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How did you become set free?
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For me, it was really actually understanding that my version of God was not God at all.
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It was about a lot of shame.
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It was about guilt, it was about self-flagellation, it was about having a sense of just hedonistic values and that was like, if you think that's God, that's not what it is.
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And then there was also anger.
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It was anger.
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If there's a God who loves you and comforts you, why would he put me in this situation?
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But think about Joseph.
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He had a 20-year trip going nowhere, apparently, Like wait a minute.
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I'm a slave.
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Now I'm thrown in jail, what up?
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I was just telling my brothers about my fancy coat.
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Yeah, yeah.
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It's like one minute he's doing this.
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He's the best.
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He's riding high.
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Then the next minute he's in a pit and he's being sold so the bible was and and what.
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And paul, for many years before he was beheaded, he was in a dark dungeon writing letters.
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Job too, yeah, yeah.
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So the bible's like we could talk about very more examples, but the Bible's replete with examples of people who suffer with cause, with no cause and everything in between.
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And so I think for me, the part of healing and understanding my path was saying that you ain't that special boo-boo, which sucks because we live in a culture that keeps saying you're special.
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Yes, yes, you are absolutely right.
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That is the toxic thing that everyone is talking about.
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You are enough, you are awesome.
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All this affirmation, shoving it in our face, making us feel like we're the best, we're the bomb, we're the bomb diggity, whatever you want to call it.
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From the 90s, that's what I used to hear.
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All that and a bag of chips that's one of my favorites.
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But yeah, that's not the case.
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We get puffed up, we start thinking too highly of ourselves, we don't think that we can do anything wrong and then, when we're in the middle of something serious and other people see it, we can't see it.
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Just like what we were talking about before, where we were judging all these people who are doing all this terrible things while we're sitting there doing our terrible things.
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Everyone does it and you have to have humility and let go of your pride to see that you are doing it and to let it go, and that's awesome.
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That that is what sets you free is realizing it's not about you, it's about God.
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That is very humbling to, especially to someone who has an addiction like that.
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You have to surrender yourself and what you want in order to put someone else, to put God first.
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I just wanted to say something that I got from Brene Brown.
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I don't go through everything secular, but there was one thing that was really hit me was everybody talks about pride, right, but there's a difference between pride and hubris.
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Everyone needs healthy pride in their ability to communicate, ability to overcome challenges.
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You know, giving yourself out of boys.
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But then there's a different word called hubris, which is not based on anything but other than self-promotion, which may not even be grounded in reality.
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And so what I think is we all need a form of healthy pride, but it's hubris that we need to work on.
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Yeah, I agree that makes a lot of sense, and the word pride has been thrown around a lot lately, that it's been perverted in its actual meaning.
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You just gave us a really solid, quick definition of what the difference is between both, and I'm thinking that the pride that everyone's throwing around nowadays is more hubris and less pride.
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But you are absolutely right.
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We are allowed to be proud of the things that we do, especially when we do them for the glory of God.
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You're allowed to have that pride.
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So don't hear us saying that you can't have any pride, that you just got to be groveling the whole time and be like oh don't thank me for this, no, that's not what we're saying.
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Yeah, I have to say this though, and I see this a lot in Christian circles.
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I know it's working a little off topic about my addiction story, but I see a lot of people addicted to the pain of serving, and so let me explain what I'm talking about.
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I should say, the elder woman, the deacon in the church who's running the children's ministry, helping with pickups, with the food distribution, helping with like all these things on top of it, making sure that she doesn't even she homeschools all her kids, and after the end of the day she's exhausted.
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And she does this day in and day out, and everyone's thankful for her and she keeps thinking.
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But I should be.
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And everyone's thankful for her, and she keeps thinking, but I should be doing more.
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But there's a part of her who enjoys all the trauma of just being dependent on everybody.
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It's kind of like a martyr complex.
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One of my other guests was talking about something like that.
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It's, yeah, it's you like to feel, oh, I'm doing this for the glory of God, but then he knows what your heart's posture is in that, and if you are enjoying that, then there's something wrong with that.
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You're not supposed to be like, oh, I can do more.
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But with an attitude of I can do more, it's like no, God will give you what he wants you to do.
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It's not about you, yeah, yeah.
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I'm glad that you said that, because for a lot of people who have dealt with addictions, they stop the drugging or the sexing or whatever, and then they move into that arena, which is still a form of addiction.
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I got really heavy into working out until I started pulling muscles and everything.
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Then God was like you're done, you're not going to get addicted to that?
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Yeah, you have to find a healthy relationship with God, because he's the only one who can truly set us free.
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And if you don't have that, then you are going to end up getting addicted to something else.
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Maybe it's not going to be as bad as the first one you had, but you could easily get sucked into something else and do it too much, to where it becomes a problem.
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Yeah, and now it's psychology called transference.
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It's just amazing.
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I mean, I did exercise too.
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I remember when I was in my first year of sobriety they told me to not date, not obviously have sex with anybody you shouldn't be having sex with.
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They're not your husband anyway, but the point.
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Yeah, I know what you mean.
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I remember like, what am I going to do with my time?
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So I did like I didn't do P90X.
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I did Insanity.
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I was like I remember one person like I ran three miles a day and someone was like are you a fitness model?
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And I was like no, I just don't know what to do with my time yeah.
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I completely get that.
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You got to fill it up with something and you got to fill it up with good things that are good for you and that you won't end up making into a problem.
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So what is it that you do now that you have been set free from your addiction?
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What do you do now with your life from your addiction?
00:17:31.006 --> 00:17:35.172
What do you do now with your life?
00:17:35.172 --> 00:17:41.460
Hey friends, have you joined the Honest Christian Conversations online group yet?
00:17:41.460 --> 00:17:49.994
If you haven't, you're missing out on a perfect opportunity to grow your relationship with Jesus Christ.
00:17:50.015 --> 00:17:53.227
This is a community for those who want to go deeper in their relationship.
00:17:53.227 --> 00:18:05.105
You can do Bible studies together, ask the questions you have biblically and get the answers that you might need or maybe you're somebody who has answers to somebody else's questions.
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You can leave your prayer requests.
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You can leave your praise reports.
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This is a community.
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This is what church is supposed to be, and I am so glad that I finally took that step to make this group so that people's lives can flourish in Jesus name.
00:18:21.689 --> 00:18:28.592
Also, if you haven't signed up for the mailing list, you're missing out on an opportunity there as well.
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I send out a weekly email chocked full of so much awesome content that I don't have time right now to share it all with you, but when you do sign up for that mailing list, you get my seven-day free devotional that I created just for those who sign up for the mailing list.
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If you haven't joined either of these, you can go to my website honestchristianconversationscom and sign up there, or you can use the links for it in the show notes.
00:18:58.726 --> 00:19:03.897
I'm doing something that is a repeated vow that I told God many, many years ago.
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Which is crazy because I didn't think of it at the time.
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So I remember it was just at the heels of one other spectacular thing I was doing, not in a good way, and I was like God, I'll just do anything, just get me out of the situation, just get me out of the situation.
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And it led me to seeking people, which led me to SA.
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And then it led me to a crisis point where I was not able to commingle in the corporate world, being working on my sobriety journey, and what happened was I become?
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I became an entrepreneur at that point.
00:19:41.444 --> 00:19:48.663
First it was doing personal training, because I learned a lot then.
00:19:49.124 --> 00:19:56.384
Then I uh bombed as a business coach because I thought I could just mimic and mom all the stuff that I was seeing on Instagram reels.
00:19:56.384 --> 00:20:04.788
And then, as I was doing that, I was reading lots and lots and lots of self-help books, lots and lots of psychology books, trying to figure out who I really was.
00:20:04.788 --> 00:20:16.080
And actually, and I remember I was talking to clients about life issues, healing issues, and they're like I came here for business coaching issues, life issues, healing issues, and they're like I came here for business coaching issues.
00:20:16.080 --> 00:20:27.557
And so what ended up happening was like wait a minute, I'm not a business coach, but I'm definitely not life coaching, right?
00:20:27.557 --> 00:20:27.958
So what am I doing?
00:20:27.958 --> 00:20:31.646
And what I realized was I was providing biblically based, because I don't package it with a bunch of scriptures all over the place.
00:20:32.776 --> 00:20:33.317
Yeah.
00:20:33.377 --> 00:20:34.402
I get that yeah.
00:20:34.563 --> 00:20:37.884
Yeah, Sometimes when you do that, maybe you'll get some people.
00:20:37.884 --> 00:20:42.424
Sometimes you'll get people who are like no thanks, but there's something in there they need to hear.
00:20:42.424 --> 00:20:43.750
I get your approach.
00:20:44.253 --> 00:21:01.582
Yeah, so I just basically wanted to share all the things that helped me not just get sober but stay sober and, speaking in a way from a recovering addict's perspective, yeah, that's awesome.
00:21:02.163 --> 00:21:05.248
So you have a podcast too, right?
00:21:05.248 --> 00:21:08.077
Do you do the same thing on your podcast?
00:21:08.077 --> 00:21:11.787
Is that what you talk about, or is it a different type of podcast?
00:21:12.095 --> 00:21:19.787
Yeah, my podcast is called the Introverted Entrepreneur Podcast and what I do is I talk just the way we're talking right now.
00:21:19.787 --> 00:21:58.482
Most of the conversations are me, but I also bring in therapists and doctors and other thought leaders in the healing industry and we just have really honest conversations about how being honest, being authentic, being vulnerable actually not just helps you make money in your business but leads a productive life, and all the more for those who are believers, because there are not a lot of spaces that are honestly talking about the intersection between healing authenticity and I also do whenever I get a chance to talk from biblically-based concepts, because I think it's sorely, sorely lacking.
00:21:58.482 --> 00:22:05.617
Because I think a lot of people they hear about all these scandals and they're like, well, of course they're scandals, they weren't following God.
00:22:05.678 --> 00:22:11.041
Here's why that sounds like a really good podcast, especially for Christian business owners.
00:22:11.041 --> 00:22:17.943
I know several of them and, yeah, integrity and honesty are things that people are craving nowadays.
00:22:17.943 --> 00:22:22.920
Even if you're not a believer, you're still wanting truth and authenticity.
00:22:22.920 --> 00:22:31.364
So to find businesses that you know that you can trust, that are transparent with you and honest and vulnerable, that is definitely something that is needed.
00:22:31.364 --> 00:22:41.949
So I appreciate so much that you're devoting yourself to that and to helping people heal and actually be healed from their addictions.
00:22:41.949 --> 00:23:14.007
That's also really awesome and definitely important and needed, I think, during 2020, with the lockdowns, whether you had an addiction to begin with, I think it got amped up with the fact that you couldn't do or go anywhere and if you didn't have one, there's probably a lot of people who picked one up, and there's so many people hurting just like the past that you had and maybe they didn't pick up an addiction, which I think would be very surprising but just dealing with the baggage from that and needing to heal.
00:23:14.047 --> 00:23:19.728
There's so many people in this world who need healing right now and God is the one who can help them.
00:23:19.728 --> 00:23:21.198
We are his hands and feet.
00:23:21.198 --> 00:23:25.817
We are here to help and those who have been there, done that and pulled through.
00:23:25.817 --> 00:23:34.625
We need to band together and help those who aren't there yet, instead of judging them, like I used to do with strippers.
00:23:35.654 --> 00:23:35.895
You know.
00:23:35.895 --> 00:23:46.381
I'll say this though, and I don't want to grill too much about the whole pandemic, but it's on my mind that during the pandemic, the churches were closed, but the liquor stores were open.
00:23:46.934 --> 00:23:49.821
Yeah, yeah, it made no sense.
00:23:49.821 --> 00:23:57.460
Our church didn't close for too long, but they did go for it for a little bit, until my pastor was like I've had enough.
00:23:57.460 --> 00:24:01.737
We're not doing this and opened up, and our church has been thriving since.
00:24:02.218 --> 00:24:06.988
And you got to speak the truth, you got to stand up for truth.
00:24:06.988 --> 00:24:20.285
We got to do the hard things and it's going to cost us, and that's why we need to not have hubris, that's why we need to be humble and remember it's not about us, it's about God.
00:24:20.285 --> 00:24:22.875
So what is the name of your website?
00:24:22.875 --> 00:24:30.384
Because I know that there's people listening who are just sitting here going I need this kind of help, or I know somebody who does need this kind of help.
00:24:31.035 --> 00:24:35.126
Yeah, my website is denisegleecom.
00:24:35.126 --> 00:24:40.240
Just take off all the spaces and if you see an afro, then you're in the right place.
00:24:43.920 --> 00:24:45.960
You are so sweet, I love you so much.
00:24:45.960 --> 00:24:48.980
You're making me laugh harder than I have laughed in a while.
00:24:50.414 --> 00:24:51.117
Follow the fro.
00:24:51.117 --> 00:24:55.243
Follow the fro, you know, like Lucky Charms, like follow the rainbow.
00:24:58.694 --> 00:25:00.377
You're awesome.
00:25:00.377 --> 00:25:02.340
You have such life in you.
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